20 Questions: When a Date Feels Like an Interrogation
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Ah! That’s about all I can say at the moment about my date tonight…. Just give me a moment to gather my thoughts and I will unload! Actually, it wasn’t a date. You could call it an interrogation before you could call it a date!
I had never met this guy before – set up through a friend of a friend. First bad move. We decided to meet at Starbucks since I like to make blind dates a short affair in case the date is going horribly wrong (good dating rule). When we met he seemed very nice and we sat and talked for about 15 minutes. He asked me questions about myself and so I talked a bit to give him an idea of who I am and where I came from. I asked him a lot of questions as well but he kept asking about me. When my stories came to an end I asked him again about himself. He told me, “Well I was born in Mumbai, raised in London and I have been here for 10 years working as an IT consultant.” Then he abruptly stopped and said, “I’m really sorry but I’m extremely hungry, can I take you to get some food?” At first I tried to get around it but he was really nice and it was dinnertime so I gave in (broke my dating rule).
We went down the street and he ushered me into Chipotle. Yeah, Chipotle. First of all, I don’t even like Chipotle and secondly, he didn’t even ask me if I was okay with getting food there. We went in and he got us food even though I told him I didn’t really want anything. We sat down and he said, “So what questions do you have for me?” I said, “Well do you have family here? What do you do for fun?” He smiled and said, “No, ask me questions about me and what I’m looking for.” I thought to myself, well if you want to tell me certain things go ahead – who needs a prompt? I said, “I don’t know what you want me to say.” So he turned it around and said, “Well, there are certain things I want to know about you and you should know certain things about me. What are you like as a girlfriend?” What!? I replied, 
“As a girlfriend? I’m not sure I understand.” He tried to explain, “Are you passionate? Do you hold hands in public? Will you show affection in public?” I was really taken aback over these questions. I was in shock and he just sat there, all business, waiting. I slowly replied, “No, I’m not overly affectionate in public.” He got annoyed, “Why not? If I reached to hold your hand you would take it away? Wouldn’t you care?” I sat back and secretly pinched my arm under the table – was I having a nightmare? I tried to end the conversation, “Well I don’t know how to answer a question like that. When you are in a relationship and in the moment, you find these things out. You don’t just ask me if I’m the type of girl who will hold your hand and ask how I show affection. Those are things you spontaneously find out about a person if things feel right.” He responds, “Well, I think things feel right and so I just want to make sure you are okay with me touching you.” Okay, the end. I stand up and say, “I think I’m going to head out.” He gets really frustrated and asks, “What do you mean you’re leaving? Ask me questions, ask me.” I told him as calmly as I could without blowing a gasket, “I don’t have any questions for you, I don’t want to know any more. I want to leave.” He asks in an angry tone, “Would you go out with me again?” I really felt like I had stepped into the Twilight Zone. I laughed sarcastically and made a beeline for the door. He’s probably still sitting there wondering what went wrong.
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