The Distance Dance
Welcome back!
(go back to Chapter II)
Chapter III
As I realized what was forming between Jim and I we began to do what I call, the distance dance. I wanted to remain further than an arm’s reach away yet I didn’t want him to think I wasn’t interested. This turned into many flirty conversations but nothing overly obvious. There were a few times when he’d compliment me in a way that would both flatter me and make me tilt an eyebrow. He would say I was pretty. He would say I inspired him to work harder. He would say I was one of the most motivated and intelligent woman he’d ever met. 
Who wouldn’t be flattered? I didn’t return these compliments for two reasons. I’m not usually the type of person who verbally compliments someone (yes I need to work on that) and I was also unsure of how it would be taken. I had been keeping my physical distance and now I was also keeping my vocal distance. What was I afraid of? Looking back, I was afraid he wasn’t feeling the same way I was feeling. Silly, I know. I was also afraid to get involved with someone who was coming out of a long term relationship. All I knew was that I was intrigued; I wanted to see where things would go. I began to wonder how long this dance would last.
During this time I was also questioning my own feelings. What did I want? Was I really interested in Jim as more than a friend? Where did I see this going? The answers were obvious to me but I wasn’t ready to admit them yet. I have had so many relationships in the past start because I initiated them. I wanted this to be different. I wanted him to approach me. I want to know someone wanted me. I wanted someone to man up and admit it. Okay, flashing neon lights now: Ask me out!
Then Jim asked me to join him at an event (finally!), however, I was simultaneously hit with a business opportunity that meant traveling for some time. I would be gone for a while so any dating plans would have to wait – but was Jim asking me out on a date? I wasn’t so sure. My intuition told me yes but another part of me warned that it might not be a date and not to get my hopes up. I do put my career ahead of anything else, and Jim knows this, so I bought my tickets to head out of town that weekend. The realization that I would be out of contact for a while struck a nerve in me. In the last conversation with Jim before I left town, he told me he would really miss me. I finally gave in and told him I’d miss him as well, because I would. The distance dance would continue a bit longer.
to be continued…
RSS and Twitter!
